🤯 INCRÍVEL: 56 Strange Things Fathers Have Said Or Done In Maternity Wards 😲
Last month, a dad asked one of our OBs for an “extra stitch” during his wife’s repair after delivery. Her immediate response was, “exactly how small do you need it to be, sir?”
Legend on our unit now.
I’m not an OB/GYN. However, I am a flight medic who has delivered three babies. I’ll never forget any of them. The second baby I delivered was about 5 weeks early, roadside, in East Jesus nowhere.
The family had gone camping in the desert and mom went into labor. By the time we arrived, there was no turning back and baby’s head was visible. Mom was sort of squatting with her forearms on the middle row of seats in a van and her booty was aimed out the door (she was clothed in a loose dress). Just as she was pushing the head out, dad said, “Wait wait wait…we might get blood on the floor!” Mom rounded on him with the biggest glare and said, “F your mom’s van!!!”
That became a unit motto.
A story from internship. Checked a woman who was not progressing in labour and thought “that’s not a head”. Sure enough, the baby was breech. She was a very tiny woman and this was a large baby, so it was pretty clear that she would need a c-section.
She was a recent immigrant from a small third world country, didn’t have a partner with her, and spoke absolutely no English. Unfortunately nobody on the unit spoke her language. I tried my best to mime and explain what was happening and what we were recommending. She nodded yes, but I had a strong sense she didn’t understand the explanation. We sent somebody down to housekeeping and the cafeteria hoping we could find any hospital staff who could translate.
Fortunately we eventually found someone who was able to translate. It turns out that she understood that the baby was breech, but that she thought we would have to literally cut her open and end her in order to save her baby! Her relief and joy when she finally understood what the plan was, was something I won’t forget. The staff member from housekeeping was wonderful and stayed to support her until she went into the OR.
My ex boyfriend is an OB/GYN. He got annoyed with me when I was having cramps and said because he was an obgyn he knew exactly what that pain felt like and told me to get over it.
Shoulda seen that as the first of many red flags.
Not an OBGYN here, My ex boyfriend was adamantly against me using tampons/cups/discs or anything that had to be inserted. He told me it would change the shape of my privates. He believed that after a certain amount of time together, my area would change to his shape so we would be a “perfect fit”.
That and me using supers or ultra tampons would mean I would need a girthy-er man…because, you know, a wad of cotton would stretch me out like CRAZY.
so my question is…does that “perfect fit” scenario also apply to the 11 other women he was boning on the side? no? just me? aw, i must be special.
Back in my OB rotation in med school, we had a pregnant woman who was supermorbidly obese with a BMI in the 70s. During her first prenatal visit, the resident was asking about her pregnancy history, past difficulty with fertility and conception, problems with the pregnancy so far, etc. Pretty standard stuff as far as I understood at the time.
Husband then chimed in about the conception. Turns out they had no trouble conceiving…. He then went into detail about how the conception went and blew my little inexperienced mind. Basically, the wife’s mother and sister had to help with conception by holding the wife’s thighs out of the way enough that he could get in to do the job. I still don’t have words.
Not a mind blowing thing that was said, but still kinda funny. When I was in medical school, I did my OB rotation on the High Risk area (medical students were generally scared of this area, so I was the only student with an awesome attending and got to do a lot). We called the attending on this service a random thought generator….if he thought of something, he would say or act on it.
We had one patient that showed up on our service in active labor. She had a very uneventful pregnancy and we couldn’t figure out hy she was on our service, but, hey, we’ll take a normal patient. She arrived with perfect makeup, perfect hair, and she had the perfect epidural and was in no pain or distress. The attending looked at me and said that I’d be doing this delivery. Okay, I thought. No problem. Then he looked at the father and said, “No. You’ll deliver this one.”
The father got wide eyed and the mother started laughing. “He’s an air traffic controller. I’ve never seen him panic before!”
The nurse took him to the sink, gave him a scrub brush and had him start washing his hands. We turned back to the mom (“OK, push 1, 2, 3…..10. Relax.”) We looked at the dad and he’s still washing that same finger he started with. OK, that’s good enough (a delivery is by no means sterile), put this, this and this on. Our attending didn’t put women in stirups, but would instead deliver straight onto the bed. He sat the dad on the bed with him on n one side and me on the other side and the dad delivered his own healthy child.
Not quite what you are asking for but when my wife was pregnant she fell down the stairs because our other child decided she wanted to jump out of Mom’s arms. Cue all the bruising and preterm labor.
After that, appointments got really awkward. Nurses were short with me. I finally told my wife that I had a feeling the staff didn’t like me and I figured I’d sit the next appointment out unless she really wanted me there.
My wife said she noticed all of this and decided to ask a nurse what the deal was. Turns out the whole office just assumed I’m the one who pushed her down the stairs. I wasn’t even home when it happened. That’s when I found out that I apparently look like the type of guy who would push a pregnant woman down the stairs.
Obligatory not an OB/GYN, but a operating room nurse.
One gynecologist told us once about their gynecologist in training. We all knew him. He was a young, friendly and good guy to work with. He was already married, father of 2 kids at the age of 25. This guy had only one negative aspect. And it was affecting his work dearly. He was extremely religious. This doesn’t have to be negative. But his decision making was based on his religion, and he often refused to offer contraceptives to his female patients and he was reserved talking and explaining contraception methodes with couples. It was against his religion. Eventually word got around with his superiors, and they had to sit him down. Explaining him it’s against the law to withhold any form of help and information.
My second delivery, I had the most amazing nurse. My first was kind of a circus, but my second I had an epidural, so it was very chill while we were prepping to push. She turned to my husband and informed him “Whatever you do, don’t talk about how tired you are for a few weeks. You have no idea how many times I’ve heard a husband talk about how tired he is after a woman just went through labor, and everyone in the room wants to smack him.”.
Had to have an emergency c-section, and my husband was in there, watching the whole thing over the sheet. After the baby was born, the doctor removed the placeta, and my husband asks, “What is THAT?” Without missing a beat, doc turns to the second doctor assisting, holds it up and says, “I don’t know, what IS this?” All I could see at this point was my husband’s face, and it was sooooo worth it.
Not an OB but I work in an ER and we had a 22-year-old woman come in a while back. I asked her what she was here for and she said “I found a hole.”
“Like an abscess?”
“I found a HOLE.”
“Okay. Is it a wound? Does it hurt?”
“No, it’s just a HOLE. It’s a black hole.”
I 100% didn’t understand what she was talking about and knew that I wouldn’t get any more info from her at the check-in desk, so I gave her the bracelet and sent her to the triage nurse, who had the same conversation with her. She couldn’t specify anything beyond “Look, it’s just a HOLE!”
It was her private area.
Not an OB but apparently my dad asked my mom’s doctor when she was in labor how long it would take me to open my eyes (like puppies/kittens).
I was a receptionist and this woman came in crying. Her husband was behind her and she said, “help im bleeding.” Long story short, we found out she was actively miscarrying in the lobby. She went to a back room for emergent care while a surgical room was prepped and she was, of course, crying and moaning and she seemed to be in immense pain.
The husband was stoic the whole time. Nonplussed. Not bothered in the least. He frowned at her moaning and said, “will you knock it off? You’re embarrassing me.”
He even had the nerve to ask us to watch his daughter in our breakroom while he went for a smoke.
I had a scheduled C-section. My husband was awesome and supportive and, while I was getting the epidural he decided to keep me calm and relaxed by having a normal conversation with me. So, as the needle is going into my back, he holds my hand and says “Hey, the new Pirates of the Caribbean movie is in theatres tomorrow!”.
Not an OB/GYN but a nurse, and not anything a husband or boyfriend said but still an interesting story. I once took care of a patient who had a baby as a virgin. She was a very religious woman who was saving her virginity for marriage. She told me she never met the right man and she was ready to have a baby as she was getting older (she was in her early 40’s). So she had IVF done and had a baby while also being a virgin.
During my OBGYN rotation, I delivered my first baby independently near the end of my rotation. I was so psyched. As the baby was finally emerging, I caught the football and held the baby securely in my arms but forgot to announce to the mom or the nurses “congratulations it’s a…”. Finally the nurse asks me,”well…?”. And I reflexively blurted out”it’s a boy…” But as I said boy I actually glanced down seeing a taco and quickly tried to cover my stupidity with “boy a GIRL!!”. I’m pretty sure no one was fooled, but they all found it amusing. From then on I was that medical student known for not being able to identify genders.
Not a medic but I have been told by one midwife that a guy asked her to hurry up with the birth as the footy was starting soon and it’s a cup match.
My mother is an OB/GYN. She did a manual privates exam for a woman and the husband asked her (with an angry tone of voice) if there was any other way of doing the exam besides her using her fingers, because he didn’t like her putting her fingers in his wife.
Not a doctor, but pregnant. I told my bf we should make and freeze 1-2 months of meals before the birth, because we’d be too tired to cook. He looked at me knowingly and said, ah, yes, like pureed fruits and vegetables so we don’t have to mash them ourselves. He literally thought you feed the baby baby food from day 1. We’re in our 30s, college educated, he has a huge, close extended family with lots of babies, and he knows I’m going to breastfeed. I guess he thought you do both from day 1?
Not an OB, but when I was in med school I was seeing a pregnant teen who was convinced she couldn’t be pregnant. I asked if she was active and she said yes. And I asked if she used any type of contraception and she said no. However, she said that her bf told her he couldn’t get her pregnant because he got kicked in the balls…a lot!
When I was working night shift in the mother/baby department, a couple came in very concerned because the pregnant woman had started bleeding. The admitting nurse asked the color and amount of the blood (it’s relevant) and the chick says, “There’s still some on his chin there, that’s what color it was.” The guy looked embarrassed and the nurse kept a straight face long enough to get out of the room and tell the rest of the unit.
Hope you forgive me for the switch around, but when my gf had given birth to our son at home it was about eight at night. The two midwives had been there since before dinner time. So when our son was born and we we were all talking about how everything went well and our son was cuddling up to my gf in bed, I asked if I should order pizza for us all. I reckoned they were pretty hungry, I sure was. Their dry answer was that that was the first time they were ever asked that. And no, they didn’t want pizza. So no pizzarino for new dadderino either.
Midwife here,
The most disgusting thing that’s often said by male partners to the midwife if the woman has had a tear after giving birth;
“put another stitch in will you” then they’ll proceed to laugh at their own ‘joke’
Makes me so angry!
When my wife was delivering our third child (a VBAC), I asked the doctor, as a joke, “can I be the one who chews the umbilical cord in half” and he looked at me with a distant look and said “yeah, I guess”
After several complications and several hours, a beautiful girl was in the world and the doctor said “okay daddy, get out of the floor and chew this cord in two if you’re ready”
Yeah I didn’t do it.
When my sister was doing her residency in the hospital, she’d also have to do shifts in the ER. She told us a story of a patient, a Turkish girl/young woman, who was having pain during the last stages of her pregnancy (like, 7 or 8 months IIRC). So, proper huge belly, and lots of time already having been pregnant.
After the examination and being cleared of anything serious, she still seemed very worried, so my sister talked a bit about pregnancies, childbirth, raising a family (this was her first), and so on. The girl eventually told her what gnawed on her so tremendously ever since she had the pregnancy test. She was afraid that the baby wasn’t hers.
Now it is not uncommon here in Germany for young Turkish girls, or really any muslim population or recent generation immigrants, to purposely be kept uneducated. Being raised behind a veil of ignorance, if you’ll allow a political philosophy pun 😉
So it doesn’t come as that big of a surprise that ed in many of these girls is seriously lacking, as is their belief in the fidelity of their husbands.
But it took quite some time for my sister to explain to her (the girl’s poor German skills weren’t helpful either) that no matter how hypothetically unfaithful her husband was, the baby inside her is her’s.
I think eventually with a diagram she was successful.
Work in IM but a patient’s partner not wanting us to reveal an HIV diagnosis to a patient was definitely a low point for me, though where I work it’s probably a stretch to even call that “surprising.”
Back in my ER days, a young teenage patient came in with pregnancy type symptoms, of course pregnancy test was positive, and appeared utterly shocked she was pregnant. I asked her if she was active? Yes. Do you use condoms? No. BC? No. Still she seemed surprised this had happened.
We had a father bring his PS4 to a delivery room so he could play spider man while his wife got induced.
Another guy was found to be cheating when his wife was postpartum and went to use his phone to take pics of the baby. Whoops.
Black babies look almost white when they’re born. I’m sure more than 1 black dad has had a few questions in the delivery room.
I’m not an OB but work at a L&D hospital. In a note for our patient, there was one from a previous office visit that said “Chief Complaint: husband concerned about wife’s weight gain during pregnancy”. She was actually under the weight she needed to be at during that time.
On my OB rotation, husband said “Holy cow,” as the baby crowned, vagal’d, passed out and hit his head on the bedside table on his way down, and had to be admitted to the same hospital his wife was having the baby at. She ended up getting discharged before he did.
Not an ob/gyn… a urologist. Wife (very thin) had a persistent belly bulge after delivery. Husband kept telling her she should go to the gym. 20 cm renal tumor. Took up more than half her abdomen.
OBGYN here. So many to choose from…many many MANY of the men asking for an “extra stitch” or to “make it tighter” after delivery. I used to ignore it but it’s been enough times that now I just deadpan “how small do you need it, sir?”
One recent young dad who was very nervous about delivery who asked me if I “do this often” (as in deliver babies). Which prompted his girlfriend to say in exasperation “this is her JOB!”
In residency I had a patient who barely made it to the hospital before having her baby after her water broke in her husbands *brand new* sports car. He couldn’t stop going on and on about the interior of his car, which I get, but maybe wait at least an hour or two after your wife has an unmediated childbirth?
I’m sure there are more I’m not remembering!
When I was in labor I asked the nurse what her wildest experience was with couples giving birth. Apparently she was on hand when a white couple gave birth to a black baby. And no, genetically speaking there were no genes that might have skipped. Mom’s face when she saw the baby said it all. Poor dad.
There was a news article I read a while ago about a young woman who had a seizure and after waking up in the hospital, she got handed a baby.
Turns out she was born with two fully functioning uteri (?) and when she got pregnant it was in the second one behind her first one. So the baby belly didn’t really show, just as other woman she also just gained very little weight and had little other pregancy signs. Uterus #1 was also having a completly normal menstrual cycle.
Mom was like: “That is so crazy, I’m not even mad.”.
Not a physician but I do work in obstetrics. We had a code OB called on the overhead, which means a delivery is happening elsewhere in the hospital and the team needs to get there stat. A woman’s husband was worried about getting a parking ticket so figured he would park in one of the massive parking garages and then walk her up to the door as she’s literally giving birth. They obviously didn’t make it and she delivered in the car. They were extremely religious and to prevent her body from being “exposed” to what could potentially be a male doctor, they kept her pants on the whole time. Baby, placenta, and all were just chilling in this woman’s pants. It was horrifying. Baby and mom were okay in the end.
My friend is an OBGYN in a hospital. Men frequently ask her “When is the doctor coming?” despite the fact that her name badge says “Doctor” in red letters.
Not an obstetrician, but I used to work in neonates (ie the doctor that immediately checks baby over once they are born, makes sure they are breathing etc in deliveries that haven’t gone so smoothly).
I’d be there for a lot of c-sections and once had a first time dad who was so excited he was running around and tripping over things and getting shouted at by all the theatre staff. Kept trying to take photos of everything which was cute. But you gotta let me do my thing and make sure baby is healthy and breathing consistently before I’m good to hand him or her over to mum and dad!
Not an MD but when I was a Paramedic I was called to a home for a 14 year old girl who I found standing over the toilet and I noticed there was what looked like an umbilical cord going into the toilet. Upon further examination I discovered there was a newborn baby the toilet. The child stated this newborn could not possibly be her baby as she was a virgin. Update… I should have said this before, the baby lived and after I dropped baby and mom off at the hospital I don’t know what happened.
“Eh”
I’m a nurse and helped deliver this girls first baby. I was still in school at the time. She was like 19 I think. The father, who was obviously much older, was also in the room. After baby was born everyone was all excited and emotional, except for the father, who was just like “eh” and shrugged it off.
OB is interesting, because it’s one of the only times you’re at the hospital for something that isn’t primarily life threatening (usually) and that decreased urgency can make male companions’ personal beliefs (religion) way more prominent and sometimes it’s an obstacle.
Especially if their religion motivates interractions with women, who make up the majority of Docs in the field. In the field they absolutely DOMINATE in, that’s where I see some brilliant female docs facing the worst sexism.
My mom taught labor and delivery. If the baby won’t fit its too late for a c section you break the baby’s shoulder so it can fir through. One of her students asked why they don’t break the moms hip instead.
Not an OB/GYN, but when my wife was in labor with our first it was a long labor. As back story, my dad and I each have very large heads and the joke with my wife was always how big the heads of our babies would be. Well at one point towards the end while she was pushing I looked down at the action and, in an attempt to motivate her, said “you can do it, the head isn’t that big!”. She promptly told me to go f myself and every nurse in the room stared daggers at me.
I have so many…
Dad was busy taking selfies to post on IG that he was having a baby
While his wife was on the other side of the room giving birth. When asked if he wanted to help he declined and said “She got it”.
When I was on my labor and delivery rotation in med school, we had two women in labor at the same time with the same father. Dude kept going back and forth between the rooms just to take turns getting yelled at by each mom.
Not the husband, but during my OB rotation the wife asked if her husband could still go down on her. This was a day after a hysterectomy. Her 15 year old son was also in the room.
Not an OB/GYN. My friend used to be the midwife at an Air Force base. She has lots of different race babies, but the best story was this one.
Military guy goes on deployment. Comes back, finds out wife got knocked up while he was gone. So, they start divorce proceedings. Before the divorce is final, the wife goes into labor, so she goes to the military base in an ambulance to have the baby, as she still had access to the healthcare. Soon to be ex husband finds out, and blocks the baby daddy from getting on base. Messed up, but hey, don’t play with matches if you don’t want to get burned.
Not an OBGYN. I’m the husband. First time my wife got pregnant I had to ask where the baby comes out among many other questions about the female reproductive system. Pretty sure my wife was embarrassed by me.
My Dr told me a story about a baby he delivered – it was the couple’s 6th and they were very observant orthodox jews so when she called at 11 pm on Shabbat that labor has started, the husband couldn’t drive them to the hospital himself (although the Dr understood, he tried to help them understand how emergent the situation was bc the delivery was going to be so fast). The Dr races to the hospital and waits.
He waits 30 min. An hour. He’s pacing the drop off. Finally, 90 min later, a taxi screeches into the parking lot at pike 2 am. The Dr opens her door to see the baby crowning and the woman yelling and the driver yelling. The husband throws open his door and just sprints off into the parking lot yelling. Does a full loop while the baby is born and runs up as the nurses are wrapping the baby and getting mom and baby into a wheel chair.
Dr “What happened, where did you go?”
Dad “I just…i just didn’t know what to do.”
Poor guy was so hopped up on adrenaline he just took off haha.
L&D Nurse here….
Let me preface by saying the couple in question was under 18 (or at least she was- he was probably around the same age).
I made a comment to the guy standing at bedside while I was caring for his pregnant partner. He responded by saying “oh i’m not the father- i’m the boyfriend”.
My mom has had five children. When my brother and I were born (twins), my dad was arguably the WORST.
As my mother was about to deliver twins, one of whom was a breach, all the doctors and nurses were tending to my dad because he had a headache.
Not exactly mindblowing, but my husband didn’t cut the cord for either of our kids and he got some looks both times but I chose not to do it, either, so I don’t blame him.
Not exactly what you’re asking but when the midwife told my wife it was time to start pushing, I asked if they could wait so I could poo first. Glad I did too! She pushed for a while!
During C-sections we use ElctroCautery To stop small bleeds. Boyfriend was sitting by the head of the table with his Gf and said “Smells Like Carne Asada In Here”
Or Last week a friend of mine had came in to deliver with her now boyfriend. We had talked before but kept a mutual friendship since. Boyfriend was also an old friend of mine. When asked how they met he responded with “Well before we had met Blackstreak [Me] was banging her.” Glad everybody else laughed cause she was PISSED.
Not an OB/GYN but I have an embarrassing story about what a husband said from a female friend. After giving birth the doctor was doing the episiotomy and the husband says *hey doc put in a couple extra stitches there* and winks at him.
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