Honesty is the best policy. But sometimes parents bend the truth to make life more exciting for their children. They might convince them that Santa Claus is real, let them believe that they saw a mermaid at the beach, or promise that thereâs no broccoli in the suspiciously green soup at dinner.
Parents donât want to traumatize their children by lying to them, though. So when one mom found out that her mother-in-law convinced her children that she and her husband had passed away while they were out of town. Below, youâll find the full story that the frustrated mother shared on Reddit, as well as some of the replies invested readers left her.
This womanâs mother-in-law watched her children while she had to travel to a funeral with her husband
Military veteran consoling child while gently telling kids about parents passed away in a quiet home setting.
Telling the truth isnât always easy. Whether you want to spare someoneâs feelings or avoid a difficult conversation, people are often tempted to bend the truth. In fact, the average person tells at least one lie per day. But itâs always better to be honest, especially when youâre talking to your children.
The Kid Counselor notes that itâs important to tell your kids the truth because theyâre going to model the behavior that they see mom and dad exhibit. Itâs one thing to tell them that being honest is good, but if they notice that youâre constantly telling little white lies, theyâre going to pick up on that. The best way to teach a child is by demonstrating.
Meanwhile, having open and honest communication with your children will build a foundation of trust. If they know that youâll always tell them the truth, theyâll feel more comfortable being completely honest with you, even when itâs tough. And we all know that trust is the cornerstone of any healthy relationship.Â
Learning how important the truth is from a young age can also inform how children view the world, The Kid Counselor notes. If they are taught how to have honest conversations, even about difficult subjects, their world view will be expanded. Plus, theyâll likely be more prepared to handle upsetting and challenging situations that arise in the future.
âKids should never be made to feel that they didnât deserve the truth,â The Kid Counselor writes. âEven with good intentions, parents who are not honest with their children about circumstances often learn in hindsight that their children resented being lied to or misled. When you tell your kids the truth, you make it very clear that you expect honesty from them as well â and that everyone deserves to know the truth even if it isnât what they wanted to hear.â
Setting boundaries with a toxic mother-in-law is necessary
Another aspect of this particular story is the mother-in-law who went out of her way to lie to her grandchildren. Itâs natural for a grandparent to desire a closer relationship with her grandkids, but deceiving them is definitely not the right way to go about it.
When it comes to dealing with a toxic mother-in-law, ChoosingTherapy recommends openly communicating with your partner about their motherâs behavior. Let them know exactly whatâs bothering you and how her behavior is impacting you.
Meanwhile, be sure to practice self-care when dealing with a toxic mother-in-law. You may be frustrated, but you shouldnât forget to take care of yourself. At the same time, try not to take her behavior personally. It likely has nothing to do with you, and she would be treating any other son or daughter-in-law the same way. Give yourself grace.
And of course, donât hesitate to set and enforce boundaries. Your mother-in-law is not entitled to spend time with your children if her behavior has been inappropriate. You get to dictate how often she visits, how often she sees your kids, and how long sheâs allowed to stay. Sometimes, even going no contact is necessary, if thatâs the only way to maintain your mental health.
The author then came back with a final update on her mother-in-lawâs health and behavior
Text excerpt about MIL telling kids and parents passed away, explaining why she told them they were dead.
Text excerpt discussing medical tests and health status, related to mil telling kids parents passed away situation.
Text excerpt discussing a MIL telling kids and parents passed away and the resulting family conflict and emotions.
Text passage describing a sister-in-law’s emotional reaction after a military family member tells kids their parents passed away.
Woman explaining to upset child while elder woman watches, illustrating mil tells kids parents passed away conversation.
